The phrase ‘back to school’ means change is once again approaching your everyday routine and schedule. Whether it is making lunches, arranging school pick up and drop off times, getting the kids to their extracurricular events, or family dinners, a busy life can cause unnecessary stress. Proper planning and scheduling can be a lifesaver especially when you are co-parenting and must come to an agreement on how your child’s schedule will be determined and executed. INB Family Law LLP has skilled family law professionals who understand the changes of everyday family life. We can assist you in creating a parenting plan that works for everyone in your family, so you don’t have to feel anxious about the kids going back to school.
Co-parenting refers to shared parenting time between parents who have separated or divorced. Co-parenting does not need to be complicated. Proper scheduling can help create clear expectations and help maintain a structure and routine for the kids that brings them a sense of stability. In the early years of a child’s life, stability is key and it is a factor the courts take into consideration when assessing the best interests of the child. The first issue that should always be considered is the amount of time that each parent has with the child. This is called ‘parenting time’ and it is typically outlined in a parenting agreement between parties. A common schedule is for parents to have 50/50 split time with their children, where the time spent with each parent is equal. The parenting agreement may be very detailed or more relaxed, but the bottom line is that it must be followed if it is agreed upon especially if it is in the form of a court order.
When it comes to making a parenting agreement that works, it is crucial to figure out the logistics of each family members life. For example, how long does it take to drop the kids off at school? While this may seem like a small consideration, keeping track of these logistics in the form of a list can help you see the bigger picture. Additionally, consider what events will take place over the holidays. If there is a family event that you know is planned around Christmas time, be proactive in solidifying these events and communicating them with your co-parent. Early communication is the best way to come to an agreement about the way in which your child is raised and creating a schedule that prioritises their happiness and wellbeing. When plans are communicated late, the other parent may be less willing to budge if it affects their time with the child. In these situations, it is the child that is affected and it is in their best interest to experience family and life events regardless of which parent has specific time with the child. Make a list of the events that are important to you and your child and consider the logistics of how they can be agreed upon and put into practice with your co-parent.
With the advancement of technology, new and improved apps make creating a calendar that can be updated and shared easy and quick. Create a calendar that can be used between you and your co-parent. This can help alleviate confusion and can act as a reminder to signal significant upcoming events.
It is important to figure out the mode in which you will communicate with your co-parent. Different apps can help facilitate communication and keeping one another informed. When you do communicate with your co-parent, consider keeping it short and considerate. Lengthy and emotionally charged messages can trigger emotional responses especially in busy times of the year. Find the right balance in your communication and consider the others circumstances while putting your child’s interests first.
It can be helpful to see the components of your child’s day as different routines. Take mornings for example. Your child will need a designated wake-up time, a time where they get ready, a time for breakfast, and a time for travelling to their school or other destination. Try and come to an agreement about these routines with your co-parent. Not only will this benefit the child, but it will also create structure within your own schedule.
Parents should find the right balance when creating Parenting agreements. A good parenting plan will account for the subtle changes in everyday life but also maintain coherence and consistency. However, with events that trigger change in both the kids and the parents’ life, a change to the parenting plan might be reasonable. Going back to school may do exactly that which is why understanding the law surrounding changing a parenting plan can be helpful. Changing a parenting plan can be straightforward if both parties agree. Communication is important to help facilitate any agreement regarding a parenting plan or changing a parenting plan. Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) such as mediation or arbitration can help assist parties in coming to an agreement before litigation is considered. ADR can provide a timelier and cost-effective avenue for parties to discuss changes to a parenting plan before turning to the courts to make a judgment. However, in some situations ADR is not appropriate nor recommended. If you are unable to communicate with your co-parent or do not feel safe in these environments than finding a family law lawyer who can represent you in facilitating a change in your agreement is highly recommended.
Putting your plan into practice is what ultimately will help you avoid obstacles and stresses that may arise throughout the school year. If you are recently separated and do not have a parenting plan with your co-parent, finding the right legal support and advice can help you achieve this.
Consider your relationship with your fellow co-parent. If this is a relationship that you consider amicable, discuss your options in putting a parenting plan into motion for example mediation or another form of ADR. If you wish to gain further family law advice and expertise on this topic, book an initial consultation with a lawyer where you can discuss your concerns with a legal professional and feel better about your options and choices going forward. At INB Family Law LLP, the needs of you and your children are a top priority and you can feel confident that our legal team can assist you in creating a schedule that works.